A carpet lined hole, a polished coffin, an uprooted tree, disturbed earth and mangled grass. Children with out a father, parents burying a son, a wife alone, nieces and aunts dressed in white, a mother dressed in celebration purple. Scripture. Tears. Laughter. Poignant music. Stories, tributes and accolades of a life well lived and well loved. These are the images and words that woke me up several times these past few nights following the burial and celebration of the life of a dear friend. Our family walked along side Tod and his family the past three weeks as he fought courageously to hold on to life while confronting head-on the possibility of death. He never took his eyes off Jesus nor questioned the healing and joy that awaited him in heaven as much as he longed for restoration here. Although blogging about life with Joshua moved to the background, some of the intrinsic values that define him were magnified through this journey with Tod.
I cannot recall one time that Joshua has held a grudge against anyone. His inarticulate speech has been mocked. The way food sometimes falls out of his mouth has been scorned. His struggles to remember and recall words or information he has heard or learned multiple times has been treated with much less than grace and compassion. Verbal expressions of exasperation with some of his peculiar habits have been uttered. He is sometimes ignored and brushed over. He is an easy scapegoat. And I am ashamed to say that this derision has not only been delegated by strangers, family and "friends," but has ricocheted off the walls of our home.
Tod literally needed a new heart. By the time his disease was diagnosed his heart was only functioning at 30%. I need a new heart. I heart that is much more willing to forgive; to graciously give up my right to punish someone who has hurt me. That is Joshua. Everyday he takes the "world's" scorn on his shoulders and then with innocent grace he sheds it and asks for a hug and a bowl of apple sauce or a chance to play baseball. He forgives from a heart that has a boundless supply of grace (Matthew 18:21-22)a. Every year 80 - 90% of people who receive a prenatal diagnosis of Down syndrome choose to abort their child. This number is likely to increase with the development of safer testing methods Read the story. Joshua is not yet aware of this contempt for his "kind." Will he be able to forgive that as well? Jesus did and still does. Joshua has a heart that reflects the love and grace of Jesus for all people. That is also the type of heart that Tod had and this ubiquitous part of his character drew people to him from many persuasions.
Medical advances have made it possible to give people in Tod's situation a new heart and the hope and possibility of restored life. That same medical establishment and the Supreme Court have given parent(s) the option to stop a beating heart, to squelch love, to disregard forgiveness and disdain grace.
Forgiving someone who has hurt you is one of the most precious gifts you can give. It releases them from the burden of their guilt and shame and helps them begin a journey of healing and reconciliation. Instead of condemning, forgiveness liberates and rescues (John 3:17)b. Joshua, and his heart of forgiveness, puts flesh on and bears witness to the free gift of forgiveness, through grace, that Jesus on the cross makes accessible to everyone. John 1:8-10 says, "He [John the Baptist] himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light. 9 The true light that gives light to everyone [emphasis added] was coming into the world. 10 He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him." The apathetic acceptance of the abortion of fetuses with Down syndrome suggests that we do not yet recognize the "light" of Him that marks everyone as image bearers and children of the living God.
Footnotes:
a. Matthew 18:21-22 21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
Mom
